Hello 2012, Don’t Leave Me Behind

I guess the Mayans were just pulling our leg because here we all are, content and eating bacon in 2012.

Of course the Rapture could still be upon us but who else is secretly hoping that they get left behind because they suspect that this is where the party will be rocking after He has gone all Simon Cowell on the world? Of course now that I’ve said that I’m destined to suffer a fate filled with looping Kirk Cameron movies for the rest of eternity. Awesome.

Also by making such a flippant remark about the end of times I’ve probably offended a whole group of friends who happen to be Believers. But be not offended my friends! I mock Mr. Cameron and his acting skills, not your faith. Truth be told, I’ve never been able to take any graduates of the Alan Thicke guild of merrymakers seriously and for those following along, that sentiment includes a certain Mr. Leonardo DiCaprio who will always be for me Cousin Oliver, I mean, Luke Brower from Growing Pains.

Even Inception Could Not Blot Out This Visual

Sidenote: The same goes for George Clooney who despite getting hotter as the years pass, will always be the lovable and helpful carpenter neighbour George Burnett who had a thing with tough girl Jo Polniaczek and made all the girls feel that special tingle downstairs at Edna’s Edibles. Some people tell me that they can’t shake his Booker Brookes from his time on Roseanne but I will never get over his contribution to a show that was so instrumental in my formative years. You take the good and you take the bad haircuts, you take them both and there you have George Clooney with a mullet.

Who's Edna's Most Edible Now?

Anyway. This post was going to be about how much of a bummer 2011 was for me but I’m glad it’s not going in that direction. Instead this post is all about *nothing* which is a patented speciality of mine (patent pending). Talking about *nothing* in 2012 is feeling good, really good.

So let me sign off with a Happy New Year everyone and best wishes for you in 2012. Renewal is running rampant today so grab yourself a piece and press reset. Onward and upwards to a new year of writing because just like you are the only one who can silence the words from within, you are the only one who can release them upon your unsuspecting audience. [insert evil cackle right about here]